24 May 2011

After few times been to time square, today finally she bough the DSLR Nikon 5100. Well, how I felt about this, can be good and in the same time bad. I felt good because I really wish can capture picture with her no matter where we go together with DSLR. It's like I can't wait to go around the world with her with the little black nikky. I felt bad because I can't contribute even 1% of the payment. She often said that she have a poor boy friend. Even I knew she is joking but sometimes it hurt my heart. sound like insulting me. Yet, it's true that I'm poor but I   in future I wont let myself to be poor. I want my family to have a good lifestyle. Hopefully she can bear with me the little poor boyfriend right now.


11 May 2011

Well, amazingly I'm in a god damn bless relationship right now.. 16 March 2011.. Yes it's the day she officially, mentally, verbally and so forth accepted me.. I'm glad to have such opportunity.. Today is about 1 months and 25 days.. During these months I been stressed up, even fucked up because plenty of obstacle come across our journey. Yet, I never think of give up because I know how much I want her to be part of my life now and in future. Somehow I felt the joy to have her in my life and guess what she is the only one can make me feel so satisfied in a relationship ever ever never felt this feeling before. She is like my everything. This is the 1st time ever I can be so tolerate with someone. I can be so patience and so on.. I just can't believe I'm doing all this.. Perhaps, it's because I'm really in love, I'm really into this relationship and how much I hope she could be in my future.. I fight for everything we been through but sometimes it make me feel like I'm the only who fighting for our relationship. Thus, I never blame on her because I know it's all bout confident and trust towards me but what I need is all about time. I believe when the time comes she will know how much I mean it every single word I had promised to her, and her parents as well.

Today, we had an little small argument about dress up.. We had been arguing about this matter before.  I just don't know why I'm too afraid sometimes when you are wearing too sexy or perhaps show off.. Maybe I do really care about you, I don't wish anything will happen to you and others take advantages of you.. Ya I admit it's kind of narrow minded but I hope she can understand one days. Sometime's I felt so down when every time we pass by every guy is starring at her ______. I hate those feeling so much. Or perhaps I should change the way I'm thinking to bear with this matter. I'm wondering can I ?? I believe when you are in love, you are willing to change to have a better future and results.. This isn't it a big issues but I don't know why I just think this way, I'm terrified.. Hope when the time come it cure everything.. Actually, which gentlemen do not prefer their love one to be sexy and so do I but in which country that is an issues.


She's kind of emotional girl.. Sometime's she got no idea whatever she said it really hurt my feeling but I know she is emotional and saying emotional words.. It's like a knife stab into my heart the words she said.. Sometime's emotional make human being step into wrong step and make mistake.. Never ever let emotional control over you.. Meanwhile, we are learning together to face every single obstacle come across..

Always remember emotional wont make things better but make things worst.. It will also lead us to the devil side..

No matter what this is who she is that I love so much.. When I said I take you as my last one I really do..

Our promised I always bear in my mind and trying beyond what I can to achieve it..

I'm the one who always be tough, be strong, be positive when obstacle come.. It's a must because I knew she wont but I hope one days she will..

Lastly, I'm glad to have you and I will appreciate every single moment we have..
2 Oct 2010.... 1.50am

Well, its been a long time I never update my blog due to several reason... :) Blog is still the best place for me to describe how exactly I feel.. Recently addicted to Wang Li Hom song " Ni bu zi dao de shi", it is a nice and fantastic song for me and part of the lyrics is actually what I wish to say to somebody.. If you ask me : how I'm doing recently? Well, not to say very good and not to say very bad just as usual nothing much.. PRETTY GOOD.. Just back from yam cha with cousin at Pandamaran.. Have a nice talk with them.. :) I'm looking forward...

Impossible is a word to be found only in the dictionary of fools.